What To Get Your Guy: The Right Gift for Every Relationship Stage

He's your crush

You know what you're getting your mom and your BFF, but your man? No clue. You want it to be perfect -- but that means something totally different for a guy you've been seeing for two weeks than it does someone you’ve been dating for two years. Luckily, we found picks that send exactly the right message at every different stage in your relationship.

Your Strategy: Since he may not even realize you're into him, don't come on too strong. "Men like to be the ones doing the pursuing," says Diana Kirschner, PhD, relationship expert and author of Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love. But that doesn't mean you have to wait for him to make the first move: Keep things flirty and low-key by sending the lucky guy a funny e-card, preferably on a day when you're planning to meet up for drinks or dinner. Someecards.com has great options that will show off your sense of humor and give you something to talk about when you see each other later.

You're friends with benefits

Your Strategy: The term "hookup buddy" says it all: "It's really just a friendship where you happen to have sex," says Tublin -- so buy him something similar to what you'd get any other male friend. "Stay away from overly sexual gifts because those could be misinterpreted as, 'She wants this to be more than it is,'" Tublin says. A collection of artisanal beers is a solid choice -- maybe you can enjoy them together, maybe not. The important thing is that you show him that yes, you got him something, but you didn't put that much effort -- or thought -- into the gift. 

You've only been out a few times -- but you never know…

Your Strategy: Get him something that you can enjoy together -- and that will increase your chances of spending more time together, says Dr. Patty Ann Tublin, PsyD, relationship expert and author of Not Tonight Dear. We love the grown-up s'mores-making kit from Recchiuti Confections, which comes with nine hand-made vanilla bean marshmallows, eight graham crackers and a bittersweet chocolate bar (enough to make four s'mores). Guys like chocolate too, and while you may not find a romantic campfire, a chat around the fireplace (or even the microwave) not only invites him into your home, but helps get things a little toasty, too.

You've been dating regularly for a couple of months but aren't exclusive yet

Your Strategy: We're not suggesting you morph into Betty Draper, but it's not a bad idea to show off your domestic side. "Starting to do things in the home together adds a new texture to your relationship," says Ian Kerner, a sex and relationship expert and co-author of The Big, Fun, Sexy Sex Book. "You're adding another level of intimacy." This cocktail shaker from West Elm hits just the right note: It's retro-chic -- and sends the hint that you want him to invite you over for cocktails at his place more often.

You just became Facebook official

Your Strategy: You probably want to get him the most thoughtful, awesome gift ever -- but keep it more about the two of you than just about him. "You want to give him something that he'll enjoy, but that will also deepen your connection," Kirschner says. One idea you're both sure to "Like"? A massage for two! Getting pampered side-by-side will help cement your new status as a couple and leave you both in the mood for some of that crazy-hot new-relationship sex. Find a place that offers couple's massages near you at spafinder.com, and get ready to say ahhhh.

You just started saying “I love you” to each other

Your Strategy: Even though you just took your relationship to the next step, the "L-word" is not a reason to splurge. "That beginning 'I love you' time can be very scary for a man," Kirschner says. "Don't overdo it -- you don't want him to feel suffocated." Instead, focus on something you can bond over, like this Cooking Adventure of the Month Club that sends ingredients, a cooking or serving tool, and instructions for how you two can make a different "Destination Dinner" together each month. Think of it as date night delivered to your door (well, mailbox). Bonus: It takes the pressure off him to think up something brilliant to do all the time. Make it extra thoughtful by pairing your dinners with his favorite beer or cocktail.

You're thinking about breaking up with him -- but not until after Christmas

Your Strategy: In the interest of full disclosure, the relationship experts we spoke with do not, we repeat do not, recommend staying with someone you know isn't for you -- even if it is the holidays and it would be awkward to go stag to your parents' house for dinner, or you don't want to break his heart during the holidays. But if you seriously have to wait until after the holiday season, give him something practical but impersonal, Kerner says. He'll definitely use a pair of earmuffs that double as headphones, for example, but there's nothing sentimental about them -- and well, that's kind of the point.

You've been together a year

Your Strategy: This is when you can -- and should -- start thinking about getting him something more personal, Tublin says. "At this point in your relationship, there's a sense that you could be in it for the long haul, and your gift should reflect that." A luxe wallet is intimate, and it also appeals to his practical side. Instead of a card, slip a sweet note inside so he'll be reminded of you every time he opens it. You can even get it engraved with his monogram for a personalized touch.

You've been dating for years and you're out of ideas

Your Strategy: Want to know the secret to keeping that crazy-in-love feeling going strong for years? Sharing novel experiences together, Kerner says. "I'm a big fan of a date that moves a relationship forward for this stage in your life as a couple," he says. Give your man -- and your relationship -- a lift by signing the two of you up for a private airplane or helicopter ride. Your man is guaranteed to love it, and the thrill of being up in the air together will help you two feel more connected than ever.

You recently moved in together

Your Strategy: Now that you share an address (and the bathroom, the comforter and the remote control), make sure he knows that you don't expect him to give up his own interests, too. "This is the time to get something that's all about him, not something for the two of you," Tublin says. A couple of hot new Xbox 360 games (we recommend Forza Horizon and Halo 4) communicate that you know he still needs his man-space sometimes. Earn even more cool points by writing a card suggesting that he invite his buddies over for a man-cave game night -- and you make something for them to munch on before hitting the wine bar with your gals.

You're long distance

Your Strategy: "When you're apart, it's easy to forget what the high of being together feels like," Kirschner says. While talking on the phone and Skyping can help you feel close, maintaining your physical connection is a little harder. That's where the boudoir photo shoot -- where a pro takes sexy photos of you in your skivvies -- comes into play: Since your man can't see you strip down any time he wants, this is a (so much classier than sexting!) way to turn him on even when you can't be around. If you're skittish about having sultry photos of you floating around, there's an easy fix: Just ask the photographer to keep your face out of the shot.

You've been dating forever, but he hasn't proposed yet

Your Strategy: This wine set offers a pretty straight-forward symbolism that (hopefully) your man will pick up on: drink this bottle with me now and drink this other one with me in 10 years. When you give this to him, it hints that you want to be a permanent fixture in his life: "Something that's meant to be enjoyed for years to come communicates that you see yourself in his future -- and you hope he sees you in his, too," Kerner says.

You just got engaged

Your Strategy: If there's one time you can get away with giving your guy something a little mushy, this is definitely it. "Do something to commemorate this special milestone," Tublin suggests. We love the idea of asking an artist to turn a photo of you and your hubby-to-be into an original painting. Just pick one of your favorite pics of the two of you, and send it to the artists at Your Art Now. It's a nice way to display a special time in your relationship permanently in your home -- so you never forget it!

You're newlyweds

Your Strategy: You know what they say: The first year of marriage is the hardest. So pick up a just-for-the-two-of-you hobby! We suggest a fun activity that even the most athletically-challenged can handle: riding (retro, matching) bikes. Hey, you guys are so cute at this stage in your relationship that you don't even care how absurdly "couple-y" that is. Add in a picnic lunch for your first trail ride -- followed by some hot quickie action in the car before heading home.

You just bought a house together

Your Strategy: Contrary to what you might think, men have a nesting instinct, too -- it just manifests itself in the urge to buy Weber grills and 3D TVs instead of throw pillows and rugs, Kirschner says. Help him feel right at home in your new space by investing in something indulgent that you know he'll love. We suggest a hammock: It will instantly transform your backyard into his own personal oasis. (No need to tell him that you also plan to read the new Emily Giffin novel while lying in it...)

You've been married for a few years and want something fun

Your Strategy: Unfortunately, you can't get him the Channing Tatum-esque physique that we know he (and you!) really wants for Christmas. Sorry! But you can give him a gift that will make you see each other in a sexy new light -- like a wine or food experience! "Learning something together is a great way to reconnect, and there's something especially sensual about bonding over food," Kirschner says. Cloud 9 Living offers walking food tours, chocolate-making classes, private wine tastings and more -- all designed to bring you closer, while you learn more about the vino and grub you both love. Check their site for local prices and places.

You just had a baby

Your Strategy: Of all the things you worry about as new parents, the last thing is house-cleaning. So prevent marital distress (or at least a few fights) during this delicate time by giving him a gift that will resolve the whole "Who's going to vacuum?" argument. The iRobot Roomba 650 is a cleaning robot that will do the chore for you. Now if only they would invent a robot to change the baby's diaper…

You're going through a rough patch

Your Strategy: It's hard to feel romantic when you're so caught up in cleaning the bathroom, shuttling the kids from school to violin lessons to soccer practice, cooking dinner, and -- oh yeah -- that little thing called work. Life's craziness is a big part of the reason that every relationship has its ups and downs -- and it's also why Kerner says it's so important to treat your hubby and yourself to a vacay when you're going through one of those downs. "Ideally you want something that provides stimulation and novelty, but also the chance to relax together," he says. "The key is to get away so you can actually talk together, have fun, and -- most importantly -- get close again." We love SniqueAway.com for city destinations that provide the perfect mix of fun activities and restorative amenities -- without breaking the bank.

You've been married for 10 years

Your Strategy: At this point, your kids are probably a little older and you're savoring taking back at least a little more just-the-two-of-us time. Encourage the "we" time (and help keep peace in the house) with a wireless home stereo system you can control with your iPhone. Sonos lets you decide what music is played in each of your rooms -- so your girl can listen to One Direction in her bedroom while you and hubby can sway to jazz music in the kitchen. Or, he can jam out to Led Zeppelin in the garage while you queue up some Adele while taking a bath -- making couple and personal time easy. Now doesn't that sound good?

You're in a sex slump

Your Strategy: "When you're in a rut in the bedroom, getting your guy a sexy gift shows that you understand how important the physical aspect of your relationship is and that you're really prioritizing it," Kerner says. So -- even though we know you’re too cool to ever be spotted in public toting a copy of Fifty Shades of Grey -- it might be time to make like Anastasia Steel and experiment with some Christian Grey-worthy moves between the sheets. An erotic kit inspired by E.L. James' infamous novel makes spicing things up easy: It includes everything you need for a (non-scary) bondage-themed night, like ribbon cuffs, a blindfold, a soy wax candle (for melting onto each other), and even a copy of the book to check out together.